Make New Year’s resolutions you can keep (Part 2)

How few there are who have courage enough to own their faults, or resolution enough to mend them.
Benjamin Franklin
1706 – 1790

In my last lesscon, I outlined the five elements necessary to achieve real, sustainable change with your New Year’s resolutions.

The resolutions must be your own — what you truly desire to change
The benefits of change must outweigh the cost
You must believe you’re capable of change
You need to optimize your environment for change
The change needs to become a ritual or habit

I also elaborated on the first two items, which are key in choosing resolutions you have a good chance of keeping. In this lesson, we’ll conclude by exploring the last three items on the list.

You must believe you are capable of change.

If you’re not totally convinced that you’re capable of change, there’s a good chance that you’ll sabotage your efforts in some way. Our egos go to great lengths to protect our sense of self-worth. If we undertake something that we really don’t think we can accomplish, our egos will hold us back from fully committing to the goal and giving it our all; it feels better to say we didn’t try that hard than to admit we failed despite our best efforts.

So if you’re harboring a lot of doubts, if you’re not convinced that you’re totally capable of change, postpone the resolution and work on improving your self-confidence first. If you’re half-hearted in pursuit of your goals, you’ll find a way to turn your doubts into reality.

You need to optimize your environment for change.

Our environment generally reflects our current lifestyle. If you want to make improvements in yourself, you probably need to make changes to your environment. For instance, if eating healthier is your resolution, you can vastly improve your chances of success by going through the house and getting rid of processed foods, then stocking a supply of fresh alternatives. You’d also be wise to spend more time with friends who make healthy food choices and limit your time with those who don’t support your goal. If you want to give up smoking, don’t hang around with other smokers and avoid places like bars and casinos where smoking is common. If your goal is to be more productive, unplug the TV, remove social media apps from your phone, and use plug-ins to block your internet access for periods of time.

Look closely at the things in your environment that undermine your goals, then do what you can to minimize their influence. The less temptation you have, the easier it will be to avoid old patterns of behavior.

The change needs to become a ritual or habit.

As Ovid observed some 2,000 years ago, “Nothing is stronger than habit.” Our lives are ruled by habit. But no one said all habits have to be bad: we can and should make desirable behaviors habitual.

To make a new behavior a habit, do it each and every day, and if possible, do it at a fixed time. For example, if exercising regularly is a resolution, make it a habit to get up half an hour early and exercise first thing every day. If self-improvement is on your list, make it a habit to listen to educational or inspirational podcasts or MP3s while driving, cleaning house, or doing other activities that occupy your hands but not your mind. If you make the new behavior a habit, in time you’ll find yourself doing it without conscious effort.

The new year is a natural time to consider areas of our lives we want to improve. But making resolutions we can’t keep does more harm than good, because it reinforces the idea that you don’t have to keep the promises you make to yourself. If you’re serious about making positive changes in your life, then study the points above and use them to make your resolutions successful ones.

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man.
Benjamin Franklin