Want to be more successful? Fail more often.

Success is more dangerous than failure.
Lao-tzu
c. 604 – c. 531 B.C.

Read the above quotation again. It seems counter-intuitive; how can success be more dangerous than failure?

If you really want the answer, just look at people all around you. I’ve observed hundreds of people who were moderately successful in their careers, and that success trapped them into a life of mediocrity. Countless people rise to a level of economic comfort in a particular company or job only to be caught there. They don’t enjoy what they’re doing, but a change would mean sacrificing their current level of income. Their success now prevents them from doing what they would truly enjoy.

We’ve been taught from childhood that failure is to be avoided at all cost, that to fail was a personal shortcoming. Nothing could be further from the truth. Did you start walking without falling down? Of course not; you fell many times. But you got up and tried again, and eventually you mastered that skill. What about riding a bike, or mastering the computer or any of the programs you use in your day to day work? There are mistakes and failures in every new thing we learn, and the more complex (and valuable) the skill we try to master, the more times we’ll fail before we get it right.

If you’re going to achieve any degree of success in life, you need to change your beliefs about success and failure. It’s important to understand that if you want more success, you have to accept more failure as well. You’ll be learning, and there’s a learning curve for each new activity you try to master.

There are two things you need to do each time you experience failure. First, ask the very important question, “What lesson should I learn from this experience?” Then let go of the attachment to failure. Don’t dwell on the fact that you made a mistake or that things didn’t go the way you’d planned. Learn to think like a toddler trying to walk. They don’t focus on the fact that they fell. They let it go and keep trying. Dwelling on a past mistake doesn’t change the outcome, but it does rob us of living in the present. There’s nothing we can do to change past events, so let them go. Learn from them, but don’t keep reliving them in your mind; it just wastes time and energy.

Life and success are processes, and failing isn’t the end of the world. No one is as concerned with your failures as you are; other people are focused on failures of their own. As long as you learn from your failures and then let go of the emotional attachment, you’ll be on the path to success. The only thing you need to do is take more chances. Fail more often; you’ll achieve success sooner.

When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
Dalai Lama (The 14th)
1935 –

Copyright © 2013 John Chancellor